Are you afraid of change? Here are some tips from a personal development coach

A question that we have been asking ourselves a lot for two years now: How can we not be afraid of change? Christine Alexandre, personal and professional development coach, gives us keys to better approach change.

Often we say to ourselves, I don’t feel quite well in my job, in my private life, I want to change. When people come to you for that, what do you tell them?

We start by taking stock of the situation. Then, you quickly understand that there is this fear of the unknown. I think there are several realizations to be had. Indeed, change throws us off balance, it destabilizes us, but with self-knowledge and understanding how we work, we will approach it in a much more serene way.

Do you understand that change is scary?

Yes, even if I like to change. When we have understood where our fear comes from and that it is identified, we can understand that it is an energy.

Your job is also to help the person to try to explain and understand for themselves why they fear change, even if sometimes it’s so buried that you don’t know how to explain it yourself?

So yes. We have a lot of resources within us, but we forget to seek them out. It also happens that we have unfounded beliefs that will prevent us from being objective about change. In this case, we will prevent ourselves from changing, we will stay in our comfort zone. The problem is that at some point, as I often say, the pajamas become too tight and there you really need to change.

Having tools like the enneagram, on which I wrote a book, can help us. The enneagram is an evolving self-knowledge tool that helps identify our motivations and fears. For example, some people are very afraid of failure. Obviously, if they are not aware of this and they are led to a feeling of failure, they will immediately give up.

So the first step is to understand in order to be able to overcome this fear?

In effect. This awareness is important. There are also other sources of fear found in the enneagram. Other people may fear conflict. From the moment when they will avoid the conflict, it will be the main filter of their actions and nothing will be able to pass. It will also prevent them from going to new opportunities.

Habit changes like looking at your smartphone less or snacking less, are these also changes you can help with?

There is inner change and outer change. This inner change takes place on habits that we have created, which are not always adequate and which prevent us from being in well-being. We can work on what is outside of us but also on what is inside of us.

Is there an age limit to change?

I received an 84-year-old gentleman who was not ok with his love life. One day, we worked on it, he had a big belief that was preventing him from moving towards a fulfilling romantic relationship. He was able to overcome this belief and today he is fully happy.

Young people too?

Yes. I think that young people today need tools and references to know themselves and to be able to approach this change with a better knowledge of themselves. It’s a priority for me to bring all that into people’s lives.

Reference of the book: “Alors on change” Christine Alexandre, available on the Christinealexandre.com website as well as on traditional distribution channels.

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